Purpose

I'm no longer a traditional evangelical Christian. I mean, I believe in the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, the blood of Jesus and everything that traditional evangelicals do. But I no longer attend a traditional church. I do meet weekly with a group of believers in a simple church - basically where we meet at someone's house and the 'service' is not formalised. We wear casual clothes, there is no preaching, no song service, no ushering. We share some food afterward. And I felt more fed and empowered to live a Christian life in a month of attending these 'services' than I have in a year of attending traditional church.

I don't do devotions by a Daily Word either. The Holy Spirit leads me to a book of the Bible and we go through it about six to eight verses at a time. Sometimes I spend a week on one passage. But I remember much more of what I read now, I can tell you that. I've also been practising lectio divina as a way of hearing God through His word, but that's another post for another time.

I'm a Christian, but I drink alcohol socially. I believe that the Bible speaks against addiction, and at one point in my life addiction to things other than alcohol threatened to become a problem. So the Holy Spirit has been working very hard in my life so that I do not become an addict. I don't listen to Christian radio. I have gay friends as well as Christian friends as well as friends that struggle to believe in God. I struggle with cursing. I am a Christian but I have problems and I'm attempting to be open about that, not pretending that I'm just too blessed to be stressed. This will be a problem for some. I may regret this post one day. I may regret this blog one day.

The fact of the matter is that if I'd known someone like me when I was 19, I'd have said that I was a heretic. Looney. Clearly not hearing from God AT ALL. Probably possessed. And I'm sure that some of my acquaintances think that. People who've never met me will think that.

So, I'm no longer traditional.

Although I have been struggling with these new steps I've taken, I believe at my very core that they are right. I'm not telling everybody to abandon traditional church and throw out your devotional. I am telling you that Christianity is a process, a sometimes difficult one and it takes time for you to become more Christ-like instead of just Sinful-Being-Cowering-In-Pew. That knowing Jesus is all about discipleship, not playing in the church band. That real 'ministry' involves ministering to real needs, not to the church board's opinion of aesthetics. That the Bible is our first reference when it comes to God's will, not somebody else's book, sermon or opinion.

I may sound bitter and angry here, but there is something wrong when our entire Christian world revolves around a building. People leave that building, and leave their Christianity behind because the Christianity they've been taught doesn't fit in real life.

At the core of Christianity, along with salvation, is purpose. God wove salvation into the Plan for a specific reason: to save mankind. And each person also has a specific purpose in the Plan. Some threads are woven together throughout the pattern; some touch at points but spend and equal amount of space apart. Some never go in the same direction. My thread, for whatever reason, is heading in a direction that's totally new and scary for me. It involves getting married, something I never planned to do. It involves friendship with very specific people who may not be Christians. It involves getting back into serious intercessory prayer. It involves a different type of congregation than what I'm used to. It involves hearing from God rather than listening to people's opinions. It involves this blog.